Independence of thought or being told what to think.

When I turned 18 (nearly 22 years ago!), I had no idea what I wanted.

I remember the day as though it were yesterday. I remember it so vividly. I remember that I was in my room and my mum came in and asked me what I wanted to do with my life.

I had no idea.

No one had ever truly asked me that question before. Perhaps on a superficial level but not on a deep level of actually knowing what I wanted to do with my life.

I remember as a student, being told that I was wrong. The problem was that at times I thought I was right! But I was still told that I was wrong. And I listened. I always wanted to be a good little girl.

That’s why when I became a teacher and an educator, I decided that I would never tell my students what to think. Ever. I would never tell them that they were wrong if they had an opinion. I would never tell them that they should be ashamed or afraid to get things wrong. In fact, I did the opposite.

Even when my students are ‘wrong’, I challenge them to explain to me how they got that answer. If they get things ‘wrong’, I tell them to be proud that they got it ‘wrong’ and then go and figure out how to get it ‘right’. I don’t want fearful students in my classes. I don’t want my students to be afraid to make mistakes. I have worked in so many classrooms where my students would be heart - broken if they scored below a certain percentage in their exams or if they didn’t know the answer to a question. It took me months to get rid of this belief system that they had to be right all the time.

It is so limiting.

I never tell my students what to think. I encourage them to develop their own processes from a very young age.

I have a student that I’ve taught since she was 6. She is now 11. I am so proud of the young lady that she has become. She is not afraid to be wrong. She used to be. She is not worried to get things wrong. She tells me that she will figure it out. I am so proud that I was a small part of supporting her to be able to be proud of her mistakes and to take risks, to get things wrong and to try again. What an amazing future she has in front of her.

I know that when she is 18 and her mother asks her what she wants to do, that she will either know or that she won’t be afraid to admit that she doesn’t and be brave enough to go and figure it out!

I am proud to be a very small part of helping her to be the brave, strong, tenacious and fearless woman that she is becoming.

Parents and teachers, please stop telling children that they are wrong. Please encourage our children to not be afraid to be wrong. Encourage them to get things wrong rather than always strive to get things right.