What the quality of a story for the 7+ should look like...

I wrote this model a few months ago for one of my students. He was having a bit of a block with his writing and I knew that I had to find something that would engage him and fascinate him. Something that would get him wanting to read more. Something that would motivate him to write his own story.

My student was fascinated with ships and often brought along toy ships to our lessons. He would spend time telling me all about the ships. So I decided to write a story entitled ‘The Shipwreck’.

Well, he loved it! I had never seen him so enthralled and interested in a story. He read it with such enthusiasm and wrote his own story using my model as a guide. After 2 drafts, his story was perfect!

I am going to share with you my model of this story, in the hopes that it will support someone else to support their child with their story writing.

Of course, you do not want your child to copy the model. A copied story will be an immediate fail in the 7+. You want them to use it as inspiration. You want them to use it to support them to write their own story.

So here it is! I hope you enjoy it and I hope your child does too!

The Shipwreck 

Written by Maria Mazarese (Creative Minds Tutors Director) 

Walking along the tranquil shore, Tom was astounded by what lay in front of his eyes. A clever and inquisitive boy, Tom had always had an interest in ships. Big ships, small ships, old ships or new ships. He was completely fascinated with them. Happily, Tom walked along the peaceful shore as he did every morning on his way to school. He lived on the small island of Travi. Beautiful palm trees surrounded the island and the sea was mostly always calm. The other day, his father had taken him on a fishing excursion and Tom had been on the lookout for ships. Unfortunately, he hadn’t spotted one but he had caught a gigantic fish! As he continued on his way, he noticed something that he had never seen before. Feeling confused, he noticed that the sea wasn’t calm at all. Crashing against the shore aggressively, the waves seemed angry today. In the distance, he noticed that there was a broken ship. “Could this be?” whispered Tom to himself. “Is that a shipwreck?” 

Approaching the ship cautiously, he saw that it was broken in two and it looked very old. It seemed as though it had been under the sea for over one hundred years. Taking out his camera, Tom began taking photos of the ancient ship. Old and abandoned, Tom went even closer, curious to see more. Peering inside one of the broken windows, Tom observed that some items had been preserved. A table with one leg missing and two small, patterned tea cups that were leaning delicately on the rusty floor. Broken chandeliers that must have crashed to the floor brought a shiver to Tom’s shoulders and he shuddered. Wondering about what had happened, Tom was determined to find out how long this ship had been abandoned for and what exactly had occurred. 

Feeling sad and worried, Tom decided to return home. Filled with sorrow for what he had just seen, he proceeded to tell his mother and father that he had finally seen a shipwreck. Asking questions about which ship it might have been, Tom’s father told him that there had never in over 200 years been a shipwreck on the tranquil island of Trevi. Begging his father to come with him, Tom was determined to show him that what he had seen was real. Quickly, they dashed out of the front door and headed towards the shore. Noticing that the waves were calm and peaceful again, Tom rubbed his eyes and couldn’t believe that the ship was no longer there. Rubbing Tom gently on the back, his father told him not to worry and that perhaps he had imagined it. Returning home, Tom was still determined to discover the mystery of the shipwreck… 

To be continued …